Lately, when I'm on the bus after work, I seem to stand or sit by the overly friendly local, or the sleazy guy who insists on asking me why I'm so attractive. Why does it matter what book I'm reading, if I'm a student or not. What makes them ask the ever popular question "are you married?", and the always over eager follow up "oh! Are you single?" (I think 5 guys have paired those questions to me in the past month)
Over explanation: (In a backwards kind of way, being hit on should be a compliment I guess, but sometimes its totally unsolicited and from the wrong type of source - my mom got hit on by a homeless man who asked to borrow a pen, then wrote his name and number on a business card, and handed it to her. I mean, my mom is gorgeous, but don't guys understand the concept "out of your league"?)
I've realized that I like the anonymity of being a commuter. Sort of like the feeling of living in a city, or attending a large university. (Only difference being that with commuting there's no need to work to make friends or make a name for yourself). Here you just go with the physical flow of people. You're a part of the mix. One of the pack. A pawn in the system of public transit. Its a chance to zone out, sleep, stare into space, an daydream. A chance to ponder, to plan, and to figure out just what I want to do next-or just beat the high score in solitaire. I like this time to myself. This feeling of being "alone" even though I'm surrounded by 25-250 people at any given time.
Yesterday a guy insisted on making conversation with me for the 25min bus ride, despite the fact that I was fiddling with my headphones and really engrossed in playing line up 2 on my iPod. He asked things like my name, what I did that day, what I thought of the city, and if I thought it was going to rain. While I'm all for the polite acknowledgment of people when they enter your personal space on a crowded bus, I realized that its so annoying when people try to engage you when you're not in the mood, or they don't get the hint as you put headphones in.
- if you want to be left alone, always wear headphones. It makes you look busy/occupied, and even if someone says something to you, you can always play it off like you didn't hear them because, you had headphones in. Once you take them out (or in the moments before you put them in) you are at risk for unsolicited engagement!
Joking aside - my social experiment would have been much less intrusive as it would be short and concise (3-5 questions) and be introduced as a project. People would feel a part of it, rather than just being questioned by some random girl on the bus.
For now I've decided not to ask people the thoughts of my curious mind - where are you going, if you could do any job it would it be- but maybe I'll bring it back in the spring when people tend to be just a bit more smiley as they go about their day.
~Jenna
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T
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